Comeuppance

FADE IN:

EXT. A SUPERMARKET CARPARK - MORNING

Gerald is loading shopping bags into the boot of his 4x4.  A woman walks up to him.

JULIE

Hello Gerry, not at work today then?

GERALD

Oh.  Julie.  Hi.  No.  No work today, same for you?

JULIE

No, gotta love these nine day fortnights.  Every other Friday is me time.

GERALD

I get one day a month and usually take Mondays for a nice long weekend, but needed to be in the office this Monday, so took today instead.  She's at work, so a  lazy day I think, perhaps a fresh coffee and a lay in the sun.  It's nice not being overlooked in the garden.

JULIE

Sounds nice, if you remember my garden is like a goldfish bowl, no privacy at all.

GERALD

Well, that is one of the reasons I picked the house we are in, end of a cul-de-sac and on a bend, only way to see into the garden is via a satelite. 

JULIE

Yes, well, there you are.  I guess I shall just have to put up with my lot.  Go home and have an instant coffee and sit with all the neighbours gawking.

GERALD

Well, you are welcome to come and have a coffee at mine and sit with no neighbours gawking. 

(quietly to himself)

I might gawk a bit of course.

JULIE

Oh, okay, yes, I might take you up on that.  Shall I follow you back? 

INT. IN GERALD'S KITCHEN. - LATER

Gerald pours fresh beans into the hopper of his coffee maker

JULIE

That looks a complicated thing, I just use a kettle

GERALD

I like this, it grounds the beans and froths the milk.  The coffee then is always fresh and hot.  Difficult to go back to instant once you have one of these.

JULIE

I tend to drink a lot of Tea more than coffee.

GERALD

So, how do you want your coffee?

JULIE

White with one.

Gerald opens the fridge and takes out a bottle of semi skimmed milk and pours some into a jug.  He steams the milk with a spout on the coffee machine and then pours some frothed milk into a mug with a spoonful of sugar.

GERALD

Weak or strong.  It isn't bitter.

JULIE

Oh I think medium if possible, not too sure how strong 'strong' is.

Gerald turns the strength dial to medium and presses a button.  There is the sound of grinding and after a moment a thick brown stream of liquid pours onto the hot frothy milk in the mug

EXT. IN GERALDS GARDEN - MOMENTS LATER

JULIE

God, you are so lucky, I can't see a single window from this garden, apart from yours that is.

She is laying on a sun lounger, her skirt pulled up to reveal her legs as she takes in the sun.  The coffee mug is empty on the grass at the side of her.

GERALD

No, as I said it is quiet too, you could do all sorts here and no one would no.

JULIE

All sorts?

GERALD

Well, you know?  It is private.

JULIE

Yes, I suppose you could sun bathe topless, although I suspect that wasn't quite what you meant.  What's that noise I can hear?

GERALD

I am not sure, what noise, I can't hear any thing unusual.

JULIE

It is like a water pump, but you haven't got a garden pond, and I can't hear running water, but I can hear a pump.

GERALD

Oh that.  Yes, sorry, I didn't think of that, it is a normal sound to me.

JULIE

Well what is it?

GERALD

The hot tub.

JULIE

My God, I didn't know you had one of them, where is it?

She sits up and looks around the garden.  Gerald looks across and fails to avert his eyes as he finds himself with a clear view up her skirt.

GERALD

In the summerhouse

She stands up and walks over to the summerhouse, opens the door and looks inside.

JULIE

Wow.  There is a hot tub at the Gym that I go to, but you can never get into it for the kids.

GERALD

Not a lot of kids in my hot tub.  Only me that ever uses it.

JULIE

That's a waste.  I would use it every day if I had one.  She doesn't use it?

GERALD

No, but I do, I love getting hot and wet and naked, the tub is all my dreams at once.

JULIE

But you go in on your own.  Doesn't sound like dream time to me.

GERALD

Well, join me and you'll see what I mean.

JULIE

I don't have a costume silly.

GERALD

I don't think you heard what I said.

JULIE

Yes I did, I just ignored it, it was inappropriate.

Julie comes back and lays down on the sun lounger again, pulling her skirt up again so that her legs will get the sun.

JULIE

I hate laying in the sun fully clothed, it doesn't seem right.

GERALD

Your choice, it is quiet enough here that you could go for an all over tan.

JULIE

God, you don't give up do you?. Well I am not at home am I?  So couldn't change into something more suitable, and I can't go naked here can I?

GERALD

Like I said, it's private here.  You could have made yourself more comfortable

JULIE

You're here.  And what would she have said if she had come home and found me undressed in her garden?

GERALD

Well, one, she won't be home for hours.  Two, the front door is locked anyway and so she can't get in, and three, well, you pulled your skirt up so far that you might as well have taken it off anyway.

JULIE

You locked the door?  You locked me in?

GERALD

Well I left the key in the door, you can always let yourself out, if you wanted to that is.

Julie looks across at Gerald.  He is laying on his back with his eyes closed.  She shrugs and stands up, undoing her skirt and blouse and laying them on the grass.

JULIE

Satisfied now?

GERALD

Yes, the view has definitely improved in the garden all of a sudden.

JULIE

How would you know, you've got your eyes shut?

GERALD

You think?

JULIE

Oh.

GERALD

Yes, things have definitely taken a turn for the better.

Gerald turn onto his side and looks straight across at Julie laying on the sun lounger next to him.  She turns to face him.

JULIE

Had I known that I was going to be seen in my underwear I would have worn matching bra and pants.

GERALD

Had I known I was finally going to see you in your bra and pants I would have worn looser clothing.

JULIE

Finally?

GERALD

Well, yes.

JULIE

Oh.  You're a married man.  I don't believe you, you are incorrigible.

GERALD

And you are a married woman laying in your underwear in the back garden with someone else's husband.

JULIE

Well surely I can trust you, that I am okay with you.  I mean, we know each other.

GERALD

Oh believe me, you can trust me.  You can trust me to be a man.

JULIE

What do you mean?

GERALD

What the fuck do you think I mean?  Christ Jules, we are not teenagers.

Gerald sits up and then kneels at the side of Julie.  He leans down and kisses her, and as her lips break and she begins to tentatively kiss back, his hand finds the mound of her breast and slips beneath the fabric of her bra. 

JULIE

Stop it Gerry.

She pulls away and gets off the sun lounger the other side to Gerald.

JULIE

This is not right Gerry.  We are married people.

GERALD

You're the one that took most of your clothes off.  I just thought that, well, you know.

JULIE

I know what you thought.  No Jerry.

She steps into and pulls up her skirt and then slips on and buttons her blouse.  Her hair is messy and her blouse is hanging outside her skirt.  She looks a mess.

Gerald shrugs and lays back on the sun lounger

JULIE

So that is it?

GERALD

What do you mean?

JULIE

Well you try it on, get rebuffed, so you just lay down again.  What about me?

GERALD

What about you?  You can stay or go, your call.

JULIE

Thanks a bunch.  You might at least offer me another coffee whilst I tidy myself up.

GERALD

Fair enough.

Gerald gets up and walks towards the house.  Julie follows.

INT. IN GERALDS KITCHEN. - MOMENTS LATER

Gerald is frothing the milk, Julie is standing behind him tucking her blouse into her skirt

JULIE

I mean, I can't believe you, I am married and so are you for God's sake.

GERALD

If anyone saw you right now they would think that we had just got out of bed. It is just what married people do, you know?

JULIE

Yes, when they are married to each other.  We aren't.

GERALD

That's just a moot point.

Gerald turns around and faces Julie, their faces are just inches apart.  They stare at each other, Gerald leans forward and kisses her again.  She kisses back and her arms slip around him and then she pulls back again.

JULIE

Christ Gerry will you stop it.

GERALD

I think that your mind is complaining where your body is yearning.

JULIE

Have you heard yourself?

GERALD

You didn't pull straight back.  You kissed me back, and, can I just say, very pleasant it was too.  Yes, very pleasant.

JULIE

Stop it, I forgot myself for a moment.  A mistake, anyone could make.  I should go.

GERALD

The same mistake you made on the sun lounger.

JULIE

Until you molested me.

GERALD

Caressed, not molested.  You still kissed me back.

JULIE

As I said, a mistake.

Gerald puts his hands on her face and gently pulls her to him and kisses her again.

GERALD

I think 

(between kisses)

That you protest a little too much

JULIE

This is wrong

GERALD

It feels very right to me.

JULIE

(quietly)

Well it doesn't to me.  I don't do this.

GERALD

So I see.

Gerald undoes the buttons on her blouse.  Pulling it from her skirt.  He puts his hands up her skirt, rucking it up at her waist, his fingers bunching the waist band of her panties he pushes them down.

FADE OUT:

INT. IN GERALD'S BEDROOM - LATER

Gerald and Julie are naked on the bed, she is cuddled in his arms

JULIE

What now?

GERALD

What do you mean 'what now?'

JULIE

Well, was this a one off, or what did it mean?

GERALD

It meant I am a man and you are a woman and so obviously I will take any opportunity presented, and obviously will again.

Julie pulls away from him, pushing at him to disentangle herself.

JULIE

You pig, is that all it was?

GERALD

Well what do you expect me to say?  Are you about to leave your husband?

JULIE

Well no, but...

GERALD

No buts, it was a stolen pleasure between two adults, it need be nothing more, it could of course be something more, a lot more.

JULIE

It would be a hell of a lot more if our other halves found out.

GERALD

No, no it wouldn't.  It would still be what it was which was pure pleasure.  What it wouldn't be to our partners would be pleasure and if they found out then they would generate the hassle or trouble.  The pleasure that it was for us would stay the same.

JULIE

Are you always so bloody pedantic?

GERALD

When is your next day off?

JULIE

Why?

GERALD

Well, that is when you can find out the answer to that question yourself.

JULIE

What makes you think that I will come back?

GERALD

Pleasure.

JULIE

Pig.

ACT

INT. IN GERALDS KITCHEN.  - 2 WEEKS LATER

Gerald is making himself coffee.  The phone rings

GERALD

Hello?

JULIE

Hello.  You are at home again then.

GERALD

Well yes, oh, of course, it is a couple of weeks, this must be your every other Friday?

JULIE

It is.  I was just ringing on the odd chance that you might be at home.

GERALD

Well the weather is crap, there will be no sitting in the garden today.  you'd be more likely to get an all over rust than an all over tan.

JULIE

There is always the hot tub.  I would love to try the hot tub.  I didn't get to try it last time.

GERALD

And why was that?

JULIE

Because you would not let me out of your bed for hours.

GERALD

You didn't try very hard to leave.

JULIE

Well, no.  I was a little preoccupied

GERALD

So, you want to come round and have a go in my hot tub?

JULIE

Yes.  I have my bikini all ready.

GERALD

I don't wear anything in the tub.

JULIE

Oh.  Oh well, I suppose it doesn't really make any difference now does it?

GERALD

Well no, not considering that I have seen every inch of your body

JULIE

Well, yes, quite.  You have been places that no one else ever has.

GERALD

I find that a little difficult to believe.  You mean that no one has ever...

JULIE

Quite.

(he hears her breathing deeply down the phone)

I can be with you in five minutes if you are free.

GERALD

I wondered if you would ring.  I actually arranged to be at home today just in case.  Yes, the tub is all ready, I will see you in five.  Shall I make you a coffee for when you get here?

JULIE

No, can I have a coffee after the tub?

Gerald puts down the phone and sips at the coffee he has made.  He smiles and then undresses, standing naked in the kitchen, drinking coffee, waiting for the door to knock.

INT. IN THE HALLWAY - LATER

There is a knock at the door. Gerald walks to and opens the door.  He is naked.

JULIE

Oh, bloody hell Gerald, what if it had been someone else?

GERALD

Well she would have been invited in, just as you are.

JULIE

And if it had been a man?

GERALD

But it wasn't.  Come in in and go through to the kitchen.

Gerald stands back as Julie enters, he then closes and locks the door before following Julie into the kitchen.

GERALD

Well, do you want the hot tub?

JULIE

Yes

GERALD

Well, aren't you a little overdressed then?

JULIE

Don't I get a robe or something.

GERALD

No, how would I explain a damp robe?  She knows I never use one.

JULIE

Oh.

GERALD

We aren't overlooked.  No one will see you walking to the summerhouse.

JULIE

Except you.

GERALD

After two weeks ago I hardly thought that would bother you

JULIE

Well, perhaps it does.

GERALD

I have tasted parts of you that you didn't know people tasted.  Now is hardly the time to get shy.

JULIE

I am not shy, it is just, well, I am not used to parading in the all together through rainstorms in other peoples back gardens.

GERALD

Perhaps I ought to pin you down on the lawn and have my wicked way with you.

JULIE

Is that all you think of?  Sex?  I want to have a go in the hot tub.  You said I could.

GERALD

Yes.  I am a man, I think about sex even when I am having sex.  Why do all women think of ways of not having it?  Isn't an orgasm an orgasm?

JULIE

Only a man could ask that, it is because we usually get the wet patch.

GERALD

I didn't leave you with that problem two weeks ago.

JULIE

I still don't know how you did that, I mean, sucking...

GERALD

You didn't complain.  Now, are you going to take your clothes off and come with me to the hot tub or what?

INT. INSIDE THE SUMMERHOUSE - MOMENTS LATER

GERALD

Just hang on whilst I take the lid off and then you can get in.

Gerald opens the hot tub lid and then slides it off the tub.  He holds Julie's hand as she climbs in.  He follows her and joins her in the water.

JULIE

This is really hot, I don't have my bath this hot.

GERALD

Strange that, seeing as how it is called a hot tub.

Gerald presses some controls on a panel, jets of water start under the surface.  He presses some additional buttons and the jets of water fill with bubbles of air.

GERALD

You might like to sit in this corner next to me.

JULIE

Why, so you can have your evil way with me?

GERALD

Well, I am sure that you can wait for that.  Sex doesn't really work very well in water.  No, I meant to sit here because I think that you will enjoy it, if you sit just right.

JULIE

Why not, in my experience sex is better when I am, well, wetter, if you know what I mean.

She moves across and sits next to Gerald.  A look of surprise hits her face and then she adjusts her position slightly and leans back against Gerald.  Her nipples are at the water line, half submerged.

JULIE

Oh, I see what you mean.  That one jet is in just the right spot.

GERALD

Yes, I thought that you would like that.  And as for sex in water, well, lets just say that water doesn't seem to be a very good lubricant.

JULIE

Oh.

GERALD

Yes, very much 'oh', it would be just as if you were actually dry, even though you were in the water.

JULIE

Oh

(there is a pause and then Julie starts to breathe quickly, taking in short but deep gasps of breath.  She grasps Gerald by the arm, squeezing him painfully )

Oh, Oh God, shit.

GERALD

Nice, yes? 

Julie just nods and then looks at Gerald, moving herself slightly away.

JULIE

Phew.  You said that you are the only one that uses the tub?

GERALD

Yes, she never comes in here.

JULIE

My God, why ever not?  I would live in here.  Nothing would get done in the house, ever.

GERALD

I don't know why not, you'll have to ask her yourself.

JULIE

Well I can't exactly do that, can I?  She doesn't know I know about it, never mind that I might have been in it and know what its therapeutic properties are.

Gerald rolls so that he is in front of Julie.  He pushes her legs apart and lays against her, kissing her and playing with her right breast.  She kisses back and reaches down to grasp him.

GERALD

Hhm, that's nice

JULIE

I though sex didn't work in a hot tub.

GERALD

It isn't the wanting, it is the doing.  Wait till later, believe me it'll be better.

JULIE

Well, if you want to do what you did last time, you'll drown if you try to do it now.

GERALD

Quite.

JULIE

Oh, that's nice, you can rub that little spot as much as you like.  Tell me something.

GERALD

What?

JULIE

Why are you doing this?

GERALD

Doing what?

JULIE

You know what, here, with me in the tub, and then later in your bed.

GERALD

Well, why wouldn't I want to?

JULIE

But you are married.

GERALD

I could ask you exactly the same question.

JULIE

I actually don't know.  I do know that you did things to me two weeks ago that I did not realise people did.

GERALD

Well, sorry, I did not intend it to be an educational.

JULIE

Don't get me wrong, I am no prude, it is just that I didn't know that people did things like that.  I just never have. What did you intend, what do you intend, that is what I am asking, why?  And why me?  Is your marriage on the rocks?

GERALD

A man cannot have sex with someone who is not his wife unless his marriage is on the rocks?  Is that what you are saying?

JULIE

Well, yes.  I guess I am.  What other reason?

GERALD

I don't believe you.  Okay.  So, by your thinking, your marriage must be on the rocks too.  You have had sex outside your wedding arrangements and you came back for more.

JULIE

I came back for the hot tub, that's all.  Anything else is well, just, well, you know?

GERALD

Yeah, the price you pay? 

JULIE

Well I didn't think of it like that.

GERALD

Well no.  Cheapens you doesn't it?  God, why can't women just accept a fuck for what it is?

JULIE

Well, for a start we don't usually use that word. 

GERALD

That is what it is though.

JULIE

To you maybe, to women it is much more.  Don't forget women are giving away much more when they open their legs to a man.  It is not done lightly.

GERALD

No, no, not the first time, and then they realise they enjoy it, so they make excuses, for a while, to keep having it, and then, perhaps when they think they have control, they start with-holding it.

JULIE

Oh, I see now, she doesn't let you have it anymore.  I see.

GERALD

You see nothing.  But many men, probably most men, will cast their nets wider if the sex dries up.  Women never seem to realise that, even women who snare their man through affairs forget and eventually close their legs.  It amazes me that they are then surprised when their man fucks another woman.

JULIE

I hate that word.

GERALD

What word?

JULIE

I am not repeating it.  You know what word.  Women like to believe that they have found a man who is above such base behaviour.

GERALD

Except for when they want to play and be treated rough and pretend raped, then the only thing they want from their man is base behaviour.  I have seen it, believe me, I know.

JULIE

And have you provided that base behaviour?

GERALD

Of course.

INT. IN THE BEDROOM. - LATER

Julie is tied to the bed.  There is a gag in her mouth.  Gerald is roughly fucking her, pulling at her breast, thrusting into her viciously, grunting as he thrusts.  She is moaning as if in pain.

He climaxes and collapses on top of her, she carries on moaning through the gag.

INT. IN THE BEDROOM. - MOMENTS LATER

Gerald rolls of Julie, there is a wet slurp as his penis slides free.  He undoes the gag and then lays back down, leaving Julie tied up.

JULIE

Have you finished now?

GERALD

For now.  Why, did you want more?

JULIE

I don't know.  I don't think I enjoyed that.

GERALD

But you're not sure.  I can tell you that I can tell just exactly how much you enjoyed that.

JULIE

What do you mean?

GERALD

You know what I mean, there was no, shall we say, resistance.

JULIE

Well, I could hardly resist after you tied me up and gagged me.

GERALD

That wasn't what I meant, you were wetter than a ducks arse.

JULIE

God, you can be so crude sometimes, and anyway, that is just a natural biological reaction by my body to external stimulus.

GERALD

God you do talk crap.

JULIE

What do you mean?

GERALD

There is an automatic response to self lubricate to avoid tearing or harm.  That was a hell of a lot more than that.

JULIE

I don't think so.

GERALD

I know so.

Gerald undoes the restraint on Julie's right hand and puts her hand into her crotch. 

GERALD

There's wet woman, and there's that.  Believe me, I know.  What were you imagining?  What was it that you fantasised about?

JULIE

Oh my God, this is all so wrong.  I shouldn't even be here, never mind being pretend raped, this is wrong.  I should go home.  Please undo me.

GERALD

Who said anything about pretending?

Gerald forces the gag back into her mouth and pulls her arm back up, fixing the restraint again.  He pulls the case off the pillow and forces it over Julie's head, effectively blindfolding her.  He get up from the bed and goes to the ensuite and noisily uses the toilet before returning to the bed. 

Gerald mounts the bed and moves between her legs he leans forward so he is touching her, his face close to the pillow masking her.

GERALD

Now what are you thinking? 

(he pauses and waits a few moments)

Was I serious about not pretending?  Do I think you were serious about stopping?

(he pauses again and runs his fingers over the pillowcase covering her face)

Jesus woman, what kind of person do you think I am?

Gerald pulls the pillowcase from her head and undoes the restraints on her hands and then her feet.  He turns away from her and sits looking at the window.

JULIE

Christ.  You scared me then

GERALD

What kind of man do you take me for?

JULIE

What do you mean?

GERALD

Do you take me for a rapist? 

JULIE

No, I mean, well, no, I don't know.

GERALD

You did didn't you, you thought I would force myself on you.  And you were not excited or aroused, you were scared.  What does that tell you, eh?

Gerald gets up and goes into the ensuite and washes his face.  He stands with his hands on the washbowl.  Julie comes in and puts her arms on his shoulders.

JULIE

You have me wrong.  I chose to sleep with you, I did not choose to sleep with a rapist, I did not believe you to be a rapist when I slept with you.  Just now, you acted different, I could not tell the acting from reality, that is what scared me.

Julie lays her head across his shoulders, her arms sliding around to embrace him.

GERALD

Christ Jules, this is mad.

JULIE

Do you want to stop?  Do you want me to go?

GERALD

Christ, no.  It started off as just an opportunistic fuck with a woman I had fancied for ages.

JULIE

Thanks a bunch.

GERALD

I was honest with you

JULIE

I know, but sometimes perhaps you could be a little less honest.

GERALD

I am being dishonest with my wife.  I cannot afford to be dishonest with you as well.

JULIE

What are you saying?  Is it now more than just something you had the opportunity to do?

GERALD

Yes.

JULIE

What is it then?

GERALD

It feels like an affair.  I don't want it to stop.

JULIE

Oh.

Julie looks across his shoulders and catches a reflection of his face in the shaving mirror.  His eyes seem to bore into hers.

JULIE

Perhaps we better go to bed and make love then, rather than what you just did.

Julie reaches down and takes his hand and leads him back to the bed.

INT. A HOTEL RECEPTION - EVENING

JULIE

Hello.  Mr Gerry Smith please.

RECEPTIONIST

Who shall I say is here?

JULIE

Juliette Jones

RECEPTIONIST

I will just call him.  Hang on, it is ringing.  Hello 

(the receptionist pauses as she listens down the phone)

Yes, I have Juliette Jones her for you.

(pauses again)

Okay sir.  I shall send her along.

The receptionist puts her telephone headset down and addresses Julie.

RECEPTIONIST

It is room 124, through the double doors and about half way along.

JULIE

This is what you think you know.

RECEPTIONIST

What do you mean?

JULIE

A secret meeting.  No one knows we are here.

RECEPTIONIST

Well, yes, I had kind of guessed.

JULIE

It is actually a bit exciting, it is the first time I have done this.

RECEPTIONIST

Oh, we get several every day, you would be surprised just how many Smiths and Jones' book in and then pay cash.  It is quite funny really, I mean, as if we would say anything and turn away business.

JULIE

I suppose I hadn't thought of that, I just thought that, well, I just hoped that it wouldn't be that obvious.  Gosh.

RECEPTIONIST

Well, just to say that room service is usually quite popular in these circumstances.

JULIE

Yes, I would imagine it is, well, thanks, maybe see you later, bye

INT. A HOTEL BEDROOM - MOMENTS LATER

There is a knock at the door.  Gerald gets up and answers, holding the door open for Julie to enter.

JULIE

Mr Smith

GERALD

Ms Jones

JULIE

The receptionist advises room service for our circumstances.  Apparently it is usual.

GERALD

Oh no, in that case let's be unusual and eat in the restaurant. 

JULIE

Isn't that a risk, I mean what if someone we know sees us?  How would we explain it?

GERALD

Well, if it is a man, you seduce him into silence, if it is a woman, then I will seduce her.

JULIE

You are joking?

GERALD

No, God, no, why would I joke about something so serious?

JULIE

You are joking, tell me you are joking.  Do you really want me to sleep with another man?

GERALD

Lighten up Jules.

JULIE

You really had me going then.

GERALD

Do you want to freshen up?

JULIE

That would be nice.  How big is the shower?

GERALD

Too small for anything interesting.  I could stand outside and wash your back.

Julie starts to undress as Gerald watches.  She drops her clothes onto the chair by the dresser.  Naked she walks to the shower and enters

GERALD

Can you pass me the scrunchy thing?

JULIE

Just be careful where you use that it looks rough.

GERALD

Well, I was planning on washing your back, so shouldn't be a problem I wouldn't have thought.

JULIE

Oh.  Right.  That's boring.

Julie turns round in the shower and faces Gerald.

JULIE

I mean, really, it was a quite hot and sticky journey.

INT. A HOTEL BEDROOM - LATER

Gerald grunts as he climaxes, Julie shudders as she orgasms and grips Gerald tightly

GERALD

Ouch

JULIE

Wimp.  It was only a little squeeze

(between gasps)

GERALD

With talons.  Tell me, will I need a rabies jab?

JULIE

Your humour can be a bit hard to take you know.

GERALD

My humour is no where near as cutting as your nails.  Now tell me, where does he think you are tonight?

JULIE

Out with Amanda.  I had a bit of a chat with her on the phone earlier and so it is all covered.  She won't answer her phone this evening and Pete hasn't got her mobile number.

GERALD

She'll cover for you?  Why would she do that?

JULIE

Well, obviously, because I cover for her when she needs it.

Julie's arms slide away and Gerald rolls off Julie onto his back, Julie lays on her side and plays with the hairs on his chest.

GERALD

Bloody hell, Jules, just so that I know, this isn't your first affair then? 

JULIE

Oh yes, yes it is, I never would do anything like this, I still don't know why I am here now, if I am honest.  How could you think that I have cheated on Pete before? 

GERALD

Well, you seem to have this cozy arrangement with your friend to cover for each other for one thing. 

JULIE

No, not at all.  She is simply a good friend.  She told me I was mad when we arranged this, and that it would all end in tears.

GERALD

Ah well, that is because she hasn't known the pleasures I can give her.  Well, at least I don't think she does.  I can't remember fucking an Amanda.

Julie pulls at one of the hairs on Gerald's chest until it pings and comes out at the root.

GERALD

Bloody ouch woman.

JULIE

I have told you, I hate that word.  You do not go anywhere near Amanda, I am telling you now.

GERALD

And, just as a matter of interest, why not?

JULIE

Because you are sleeping with me.

GERALD

Well that is down to you then isn't it?

JULIE

What do you mean down to me?

GERALD

Keep me exhausted and wear me out so I won't have the energy to go looking elsewhere.  I am a man after all, and that is kind of why we are here in the first place.

JULIE

A man, not an animal. 

(she reaches down and grips his testicles)

If I ever find out that you have been with another woman, that you have cheated on me, I shall rip these from your body and wear them as earrings.  You won't be much of a man then will you?

GERALD

And you, my dear, won't get to experience these moments of ecstasy.

JULIE

Oh my god listen to yourself.

GERALD

Difficult to hear myself when you scream your orgasm into my ear.

INT. IN GERALD'S KITCHEN. - WEEKS LATER

Gerald is making coffee.  There is a knock at his front door.  He presses the button to prepare the beans and goes to answer the door.  There is a blond haired woman.

GERALD

Hello, can I help?

AMANDA

Yes, you are Gerald, I have seen your picture on Julie's phone.  I am Amanda, may I have a word with you?

GERALD

Well, er, yes, I suppose.  Look, come in, and have a coffee.

Gerald holds the door back and Amanda enters.  After shutting the door Gerald leads the way back to the kitchen.

GERALD

How would you like your coffee?

AMANDA

Oh, a bit of a barista are you?

(there is an edge of hostility to her voice)

GERALD

Oh goodness no, that's why I have the machine.  I only really have to buy the beans.  Of course there is a great deal of trial and error in buying the beans, until you get a flavour that is right. 

AMANDA

For you.

GERALD

Well yes, of course.  You can also use ready ground coffee in the machine, i just prefer the beans, they are slightly richer in flavour I think.  So, how do you want yours?

AMANDA

Black, apart from that, as it comes, and then I can judge your taste.

GERALD

Well 

(as he removes his coffee from the machine and prepares hers)

Okay, as you know Jules quite well, you probably already have an idea of my taste.  What can I do for you?  Really, I mean apart from making you a coffee on this miserable rainy afternoon?

AMANDA

She is my friend, we go back many years.  I don't want to see her get hurt.

GERALD

Well, she is a grown up and is capable of making her own choices.  I hadn't detected that she needed a minder 

AMANDA

She only talks about you when I see her.  How you make her happy in ways that no one else ever has, and I don't have to imagine what she means, she tells me in graphic detail.  I think that you are a chancer and will drop her when the fancy of her becomes boring and something better or different comes along. 

Gerald hands her a coffee and looks her up and down as if considering placing a bid on an item at an auction

GERALD

Well, from where I am standing you don't really have anything to concern yourself with, and you certainly have no real idea of the pleasure we have when we are together.

AMANDA

I am concerned because she is my friend.

GERALD

I think, right now, I am closer to her than you.

AMANDA

Don't mistake intimacy for closeness.

GERALD

Believe me, I don't.  I re-iterate, you have no idea about the closeness or the intimacy that Jules and I share and I am certainly not going to share with you any details of what Jules and I do.

As they talk they move slowly together

AMANDA

You don't have to, she has already told be everything.

GERALD

Oh I doubt that very much, yes I doubt that very much indeed.  How is your coffee?

AMANDA

Surprisingly good.  Why do you doubt that she has shared things with me. 

Gerald strokes her hair 

GERALD

Oh, there are somethings that you really do not talk about.

AMANDA

What do you mean?

GERALD

We don't talk about them, we just do them.

Gerald runs his hand across her cheek

Amanda looks hard into his eyes, unblinking as he touches her face and runs his finger across her lips

GERALD

Somethings are so intimate, so pleasurable that words are inadequate for the moment

He leans forward and kisses her, his hand cupping her head, slowly pushing her back to the kitchen work surfaces.

GERALD

Moments 

(between kisses)

That just happen and overwhelm us

He picks Amanda up and sits her on the worksurface, his head pushing up her skirt between her legs.

AMANDA

Oh my God

(she rolls her yes)

I said that you were a chancer

Gerald grabs the hem of her pants

GERALD

Lift yourself

He pulls and her panties roll down her legs, he returns his head to her crotch, his hands now undoing his belt and trousers as he works at her sex.

AMANDA

You are so full of yourself it is untrue

(AMANDA GASPS IN PLEASURE)

GERALD

Actually, you are about to be full of me.

Gerald stands and slides Amanda forward, she gasps as he penetrates her.  She wraps her legs around his back.  His movements are slow but long and deep. 

EXT. IN GERALDS GARDEN - LATER

It is raining heavily.  Gerald and Amanda are naked on the lawn, she is face down, he is fucking her from behind.

AMANDA

I have never done it in the rain, God my boobs and knees will be all stained and muddy,

(she gasps in pleasure)

ooh, yes

GERALD

We can 

(between thrusts)

go in the hot tub if you like.  He climaxes and releases a long groan as if pain has wracked him from head to toe, his buttocks clench tightly as he orgasms.

AMANDA

Missed it that time, sorry.

GERALD

That is why I have a tongue.

He rolls off her and turns her over, once more his head goes down to her crotch.  Her eyes roll and her face tips back and her mouth opens in silent 'O's

INT. INSIDE THE SUMMERHOUSE - MOMENTS LATER

Amanda and Gerald are sat in the hot tub

AMANDA

You are right

GERALD

About what?

AMANDA

There are things that you just don't talk about.

GERALD

I told you that Jules would not have told you everything.

AMANDA

But I was right too.

GERALD

About what?

AMANDA

You are just a chancer.  I don't think you care about Jules and I think that she will get hurt.

GERALD

Face some facts.  She is married to Pete, I am married to Annette.  Neither of us, as far as I know, are seeking to change that.  All it ever was going to be with Jules was an occasional fuck, at best an affair for a while.

AMANDA

And meanwhile you will continue to fuck anyone given half a chance

GERALD

No.  I am picky you know.

AMANDA

I suppose that is nice to hear.

GERALD

Does it matter?  Have we not both got pleasure out of this? 

AMANDA

Yes, but a guilty pleasure.  I have betrayed my friend, you have betrayed a wife and a lover.

GERALD

And as long as neither ever find out, then no one is hurt.  I know for sure that you won't talk about this with Jules.  But what I don't know is would you talk about it with any other friends?

AMANDA

Actually, you are wrong there, we have harmed them both, they just don't know it.  They are still harmed, your wife has a death sentence on her marriage and Jules is simply going to get hurt sooner than she thought.

GERALD

Why so, why will she get hurt sooner than she expected?

AMANDA

How are you going to fit three women into your life and keep each a secret from the other?

GERALD

Well you know about the other two, Jules knows about Annette, so it isn't going to be that complicated.

AMANDA

What makes you think I am going to be happy about you carrying on with Jules?  And come to that, do you still fuck your wife?

GERALD

By the way, what makes you think that there are only three of you, and why wouldn't I fuck my wife?

AMANDA

Usually men stop having sex with their partner when they embark on an affair.

GERALD

And how do you know that?  Is that from experience?  I would have thought that would be odd behaviour and likely to cause suspicion.

AMANDA

No it is not from experience, it is just true.

GERALD

I think that is just an old wives tale.  What you will find is that women stop having sex with their husband, for what ever reason, and so the men go and seek sex elsewhere.  When the wife find out, rather than face up to the fact that it was her fault, she turns it round and says that their man stopped sleeping with them.  I do not know a man that would turn down a fuck from his wife.

AMANDA

You are a bit cynical, christ.

GERALD

No, just realistic.  I see fucking for what it is, I see women for what they are, and as long as sex continues happily in a relationship, there is still a good chance that the man will stray given a snifter of an opportunity.  Women can't understand that.  I know for sure that you don't.

AMANDA

I don't think most men are like you, I think you are just a sexual predator, probably in fact a sexaholic.

GERALD

I bet you could get any of your married friends husbands to fuck you if you wanted.  In fact, I suspect that you came round here intending to get me into bed just to prove to yourself that I cannot be trusted.  Well, there you are.  Yes you won, you managed to get me into bed.  Now when you go away, prove me wrong by trying to fuck your friend's husbands, and if you fail , then I am wrong.

AMANDA

I am not going to do that, and I did not come round here intending to get you into bed.

GERALD

May I just point out that your underwear is all very carefully coordinated and shows every sign of being new.  Usually these things only happen when a women expects them to seen.

AMANDA

You do talk some crap.

GERALD

Do I, do I really?  Tell you what.  When next you are chatting to Jules, ask her what underwear she was wearing when we first fucked.  I have yet to meet a woman that only has brand new coordinating underwear, and that keeps her bush neatly trimmed, not a straggler to be seen.  You have definite signs of razor burn.  Come on, you came round here with at least half an intention of getting me into bed, at very least with the idea that it could be possible.  Jules didn't expect it and was a bit upset that her underwear didn't match.

AMANDA

Bastard know it all.  What are you doing with your hand?

GERALD

What does it feel like I am doing?  I can tell it is time to go upstairs again for the real reason you came round here.  I bet Jules didn't tell you about the hood and ropes.

INT. A HOTEL BEDROOM - EVENING

JULIE

I can't stay all night.

GERALD

Why not, that is a bummer.

JULIE

Mandy can't cover for me, says she had to go and see her sister about something, so I am just out with the girls, so Pete'll expect me back before midnight.

GERALD

Do you believe Amanda?  I thought that she would always cover for you, I mean, how will Pete know that she is at her sisters?  All she has to say, if asked, is that you guys were together.

JULIE

I don't know, okay?  All I know is that she said she couldn't.

Gerald silences Julie with a kiss and undresses her, smiling at her matching pale blue silky underwear.  He lifts her onto the bed and undresses himself. 

JULIE

I have to ask you something.

GERALD

What, of course.

JULIE

Well, you have what looks like a bit of a love bite on your neck.  Are you still having sex with Annette?  I mean I don't mind, you are married, I mean.

GERALD

No, that isn't a love bite, I caught my self on the edge of the shed and it bloody hurt.  Are you still fucking Pete?

JULIE

You didn't answer my question and you know I hate that word.

GERALD

Answer me and I will answer you

JULIE

Well, yes, of course we still make love, he is my husband and he would get suspicious if I refused him.

GERALD

Well, okay.  So, I get sloppy seconds do I?

JULIE

No, don't be gross.  I make sure I am properly clean before I see you.

GERALD

Inside and out?

JULIE

You are so rude.  Yes of course.  Now, answer me.  Are you still sleeping with Annette?

GERALD

Well, of course we are sleeping together, but no, I am not having sex with her.  I don't seem to be able to get interested in her.  I think of you, and I guess the risk of calling her by your name in the heat of passion worries me a bit.

JULIE

Ha!

GERALD

What does 'ha' mean?

JULIE

I had coffee with Amanda yesterday, and she said that she bet that you were still having sex with your wife and that, given a chance, you would probably sleep with the neighbours too.

GERALD

She sounds jealous actually.  What is she like?  Has she got a bloke, or a woman, in tow?

JULIE

Well she is slim and blond and when she said that, I said that you wouldn't and that men weren't like that, that it had been just a one of those moment things that led to where we are now.  She said rubbish, that she knew that men would sleep with any woman given half a chance, that she knew it for certain.  She asked me if I had intended to get you into bed on that first time.

GERALD

Wow, I wonder how she thinks she knows that?  I mean as far as I know she is wrong, she certainly wouldn't get me into bed, not while I am with you anyway.  What made her think that you had seduced me?  And come to think of it, did you?  I mean, well, I don't have a particularly good record with women and I have to be honest that I was surprised we ended up in bed.  I wouldn't be upset if you had actually engineered it.

JULIE

My God Gerry, no, I did not expect to end up in your bed, I was not prepared for that at all.  I think it just happened, unless of course you planned bumping into me at the supermarket so that you could get me back to your house and seduce me in your garden.

GERALD

Spot on.

JULIE

Pig.  I think that Amanda is seeing someone, and I suspect, from what she said, it might be a neighbour which is why she is being all secretive about it.  Oh well, I am glad if she is, it is nice to share your bed.

GERALD

My bed?  What are you saying?

JULIE

Don't . Stop it.  You know what I mean.  And if you were to meet her, I bet she could seduce you.  She looks stunning and keeps herself looking good.  Being blond, I bet she could get any man she wants.  I would lose out to her, I know that.

GERALD

I think that you underestimate yourself, and further more, she might be frigid and just lay there letting the man so what he wants but give nothing in return.  Don't worry you would more than stand up against her I am sure.  Actually, I have seen one of my neighbours in the company of a good looking blond.  Does she live by me?  Perhaps she is busy fucking in my street.

JULIE

Will you stop with the f word.  No, she lives no where near you.  Now, come here, I need something from you, and I need it now.  I am beginning to think you have gone off me for another woman

INT. IN GERALD'S KITCHEN. - EVENING

Gerald is making coffee.  He calls to Annette.

GERALD

I am making a coffee, do you want one?

ANNETTE

No, thanks, I am full to the brim with coffee.

There is a knock at the door.

GERALD

I'll get it.

Gerald walks down the hall and opens the door.  A fist snakes in and hits him full face.  Blood splatters from his nose leaving streaks on the wallpaper.

PETE

You fucking bastard.  You leave my wife alone you fucking cheating bastard or I'll come back and fucking kill you.

Pete steps inside the house and kicks Gerald with all his force between his legs.  Gerald doubles up, retching as blood drips from his shattered nose.  Annette comes running down stairs.  She looks at Pete and then stoops down to her husband.

PETE

Did you know, did you know Annette?  Did you know he is seeing my wife behind our backs, did you, did you know?

ANNETTE

What are you talking about?

(she comforts Gerald, holding a tissue to his nose)

Pete, what are you on about, seeing Julie, what do you mean seeing Julie?

PETE

Carrying on, meeting her at hotels.  I followed her, I saw.

Annette stands up and looks horrified.  She looks down at Gerald and then across at Pete.

ANNETTE

Is this true Gerry, have you been with another woman, have you been with Julie, with fucking Julie of all people behind my back, have you?  You fucking answer me right now. 

Gerald just shakes his head, his hands holding his testicles, heaving and trying not to be sick , the pain so strong he is unable to stand or speak.

PETE

Don't you listen to a fucking word he says, he is a lying bastard.  I saw him in a hotel with my wife.  I saw her go to his room, and through the door I could hear them having sex.  When she got home I could see the evidence of him on her, it makes me sick.

ANNETTE

Pete, go home, believe me if you have this wrong there will be hell to pay.  What did Julie say?

PETE

Nothing, she said nothing, she just shut her self in the loo.

ANNETTE

Go home to your wife Pete and don't come back.

Annette shuts the door and looks down at Gerald.

ANNETTE

Well I suppose it had to happen.  You stupid bastard.  Did you think I didn't know.  Do you think I couldn't smell other women's perfume in our house and on your clothes?  I knew exactly when you had been with another woman, well now you have your come-uppance.  You had better get yourself to A&E and get your nose fixed, I think Pete broke it.

Annette throws Gerald's car keys down to him.  He manages to shuffle out of the door.

INT. IN THE HALLWAY - LATER

Annette picks up the phone and dials a number she reads from Yellow Pages

ANNETTE

Hello, is that the locksmiths?

(she pauses)

Yes, I need my locks changing on my house

(she pauses)

Well if you could send some one right away.

Annette presses the end call, and then redials.

ANNETTE

Hello, Amanda?

(she pauses)

Yes, exactly as we planned, I don't think any one suspected.

(she pauses again)

Pete was better than we guessed, he actually assaulted Gerry.  I mean I didn't really expect it, but after you told Pete what Julie and Gerry were up to, I suppose it was inevitable, but, well, anyway, I have arranged for the locks to be changed whilst he is at the hospital.

(she pauses)

Yes darling.  I love you too.  Now we can be together.